Neurodiversity

The Unbroken Spectrum: Stockholm Syndrome

This series of entries on the“unbroken spectrum” began as an effort to outline just a couple mechanisms which work to obscure the demographic where paler shades of the autistic spectrum shade over into “normal.” Soon enough, and appropriately enough I think, it began to be about the ways in which much of the spectrum, or much of the autism with which the world rubs shoulders every day winds up being hidden from view. One was described in a comment by Lili Marlene which ended up shoehorned into my entry on self-hatred, but I’m no longer so sure that’s where it belongs. Here is how she concluded her comment:

My theory is that these people have seen autistic family members at odds with society and losing the battle, and have decided to take what they see as the easy path – siding with neurotypical society and adopting the value system of their neurotypical age peers, adding a few explicitly anti-autistic features just to make it clear what side they are on. It’s an attempt to be normal that paradoxically appears to lead to mental illness and alienation from family. Life is a constant battle for those who refuse to consider acceptance as an alternative. You make your choices and you live with the consequences.

There are elements here of self-hatred, yes, certainly of self-betrayal. I can recall in my own experience being confronted with incentives to go this route, and dismissing them again and again with the thought, “That’s just a piece of suicide.” For all that this is the case though, what Lili Marlene has described is more of a defense mechanism, one built around identifying with “neurotypical society” and adopting its value system. We already have a term for this. It’s called Stockholm syndrome.

As critics like to point out, this syndrome—much, I might argue, like autism itself—is perhaps even more so than autism at least as much a social construct as it is anything “real.” It does however refer to a recognizable human dynamic, a “piece of suicide” in which those who feel they lack power take on the values of those who seem to have power over them, all in order to avoid the threat of a more complete death. Allow me then to re-construct the conditions under which Stockholm syndrome can occur, simply by substituting one handful of nouns for another.

Here, according to the FBI, are those conditions followed by their restatements altered so as to apply—instructively if not perfectly—to autism in society.

A person held in captivity cannot escape and depends on the hostage taker for life. The captor becomes the person in control of the captive’s basic needs for survival and the victim’s life itself.

An autistic person in society cannot escape and depends on society for acceptance. Society is in control of the autistic’s basic needs for social legitimacy.

The hostage endures isolation from other people and has only the captor’s perspective available. Perpetrators routinely keep information about the outside world’s response to their actions from captives to keep them totally dependent.

The autistic—especially when unaware that he or she is autistic—endures isolation from other autistics and has only society’s perspective available. As there is no “outside world,” there is no response or accountability regarding society’s actions. Society acts as perpetrator, judge, and jury, a self-contained, self-justifying package.

The hostage taker threatens to kill the victim and gives the perception as having the capability to do so. The captive judges it safer to align with the perpetrator, endure the hardship of captivity, and comply with the captor than to resist and face murder.

The society threatens to deny social legitimacy—employment, sexual companionship, freedom from humiliation—to the autistic and demonstrates the capability to do so in ways both large and small. The autistic judges it safer to align with society, endure the hardship of isolation, and comply with society than to resist and face the hardship and humiliation of reduced social legitimacy.

The captive sees the perpetrator as showing some degree of kindness. Kindness serves as the cornerstone of Stockholm syndrome; the condition will not develop unless the captor exhibits it in some form toward the hostage. However, captives often misinterpret a lack of abuse as kindness and may develop feelings of appreciation for this perceived benevolence. If the captor is purely evil and abusive, the hostage will respond with hatred. But, if perpetrators show some kindness, victims will submerge the anger they feel in response to the terror and concentrate on the captors’ “good side” to protect themselves.

The autistic sees society as showing some degree of kindness. Kindness serves as the cornerstone of Stockholm syndrome; the condition will not develop unless society exhibits it in some form toward the autistic. However, autistics often misinterpret a lack of abuse as kindness and may develop feelings of appreciation for this perceived benevolence. If society is purely evil and abusive, the autistic will respond with hatred. But, if society shows some kindness, autistics will submerge the anger they feel in response to the terror and concentrate on society’s “good side” to protect themselves.

To those who might feel that “humiliation” is an inadequate substitute for the literal death threatened by the sort of hostage-takers encountered by the FBI, I would point out that humus is the Latin root that gives humiliation its motivating power. It is not for nothing that we speak of “dying of humiliation;” the humus it refers to is the self-same dirt of “six feet under.” If you are still unclear what humiliation has to do with autism in society, see The Unbroken Spectrum: Ridicule.

There’s plenty more to be said here, I believe; Lili Marlene may well have hit on the richest vein yet in this series. My intent here though has simply been to provoke thought, to evoke a small shock of recognition at the similarities between the situations of hostages and autistics in society. If there’s a more specific take-away to be gleaned from the above, I suggest it is that we might look with a more skeptical eye at the kindnesses bestowed by society upon autistic people.

Beyond that, I would point out that for all that documented cases of this syndrome are known to go on for years, and undocumented cases we can only assume, for entire lifetimes, those are individual tragedies. To the extent that what Lili Marlene and I have described here happens to the autistic population as a whole, this is a systemic, collective tragedy which whether it is engaged in unknowingly or with cowardice aforethought, “appears to lead to mental illness and alienation from family”—perhaps on a scale we can hardly begin to measure.

related:  Pieces of Suicide

related:  The Unbroken Spectrum: Ridicule

related:  The Unbroken Spectrum: Projection

related:  The Unbroken Spectrum: Self-Hatred

related:  The Unbroken Spectrum: The Shared Closet

Mark Stairwalt on 06/25/10 in featured, Society | 5 Comments | Read More